The Demise of Common Courtesy

What the hell has happened to common courtesy?

Let's say you've made plans with someone. Sadly, the other person finds he has to work late and, in a very gentlemanly way, says he's going to be later than he thought. You so OK, just call me later to let me know what's going on.

SEVEN HOURS LATER (after a single restrained text message gently questioning if he was still working) he calls you to say he WENT OUT WITH PEOPLE FROM WORK!

Let's forget for a moment that I got royally screwed in this deal. I did homework and laundry and was generally productive all night, but I always felt like I was waiting for something (mainly for the cell phone to ring). I didn't go to the grocery store because I wasn't sure what my plans were; I didn't do my 45-minute total body core workout because I didn't want to shower again. Instead I sat home alone, trying not to wonder when the phone would ring.

But all that aside, I wonder what happened at a more basic, humane level. What happened to just common courtesy? What happened to doing what you said you were going to do? What happened to just being nice to people? To me, being stood up is just not good manners. It doesn't matter if it's coming from a boyfriend or from a friend--a broken date is one of the largest of social no-nos.

I didn't answer the phone when he called and I haven't called him back. How do you tell someone how hurt you are, how lonely you feel knowing that people from work take higher billing that I do? How do you tell someone that even if you're just going to be friends, some kind of respect for each other has to be established?

Basically, how do you tell someone that they just have to respect you as a human being and recognize that you have feelings?

Right now, I'm taking the chicken-shit way out and not saying anything. If he wants to talk to me, he knows how to reach me. But when he does decide to talk to me, I think I'll have to give him my list of demands:

Just have a little courtesy.

Some Editing

If you stopped by to reread the "Tipping the Scales" post (which I know you did), I took it down. I started to get paranoid that the wrong person would see it.

Just think...you might be the "wrong person" :)

Better Than Gatsby

A friend of mine was talking about "The Great Gatsby" the other day, and when I got home I pulled my copy off the shelf to skim through it, looking for good quotes. Instead of finding a quote, I found the profile I wrote for my high school newspaper my senior year. It's all my favorites, plus my goals and aspirations for the future. So sit back and enjoy what Susie expected from her life a decade ago. It's almost as good as Gatsby.

Favorites
Color: Navy Blue
Food: Pretzels
Song: Blank
Music Group: Floyd, REM, Gathering Field
Subject: Spanish and English
Teacher: Mr. P, Mrs. Henry, Berkey
Saying: "Hello ______ Pharmacy. Can I help you?"
TV Show: Jeopardy
Movie: "Dead Poets Society"

Pet Peeves
1. People who stop in the hall and don't move!

2. Hang nails and when your contact shoots up into your brain, making it virtually impossible to see, let alone dig it out and put it back in.

Worst Fear
1. That 10 years from now it is quite feasible that I could be breaking in knee pads in an Alaskan convent.

2. Calling people on the phone.

Future Plans
Go to college, then grad school. Marry some extremely eligible bachelor (if you know any, my number's in the book), build a house with a big library that has a fireplace and a desk with a completely online, cyberfriendly computer. Have no children (maybe a dog), but the old academy [in my hometown] and turn it into the Susie School for People Who Couldn't Go To [exclusive private school] Because They Don't Have a Penis. Retire, move to Iowa, buy a cow and live happily-ever-after with my (West Virginian)man of choice.

Most Embarrassing Moment
Of my many, the most embarrassing was the time Joe Schmoe started saying "Susie" in this really high-pitched voice in Computer Science. After a few seconds, Dave Smith joined in and soon, all 25 people in CS were serenading me with a beautiful chorus of "Susie" that lasted about 10 minutes.

Most Memorable Thing About High School
Plays, Quiz Bowl banquets and how close it is to an all-boys private school.

Things You'd Like To Forget
Journalism and most things pertaining to it.

Where Will You Be in 10 Years
Hopefully I'll be done with my master's and, who knows, my Ph.D. Depending on what I do, I could either be teaching or working for the government. I could be married with a dog that I will hug and squeeze and call George. I hope to have my driver's license by then and my own place to live. Mainly, I'm not speculating. I'm gonna take life as it comes.

Defining a Date

On New Year's Eve, I remember telling someone that my one goal was to have a date in 2006. These past few years have been a drought in my social life and the longer I'm out of the dating scene, the less inclined I feel to join it. It seems easier somehow to just be on my own, trying to make my way in the world without someone there beside me. I'm not a risk-taker and dating is itself a risk. So I've taken the easy way out and just not dated. (I also have some self-confidence issues that contribute to my avoidance of dating, but that's another entry.)

Anyway, could it be possible that I've met my goal for 2006 just five days into the New Year?

The only way to answer this question is to define what constitutes a date. Is it just two people of the opposite sex (or the same sex, depending on one's preferences) spending a nice evening together? Is it dinner and a movie? Is it sex?

I've wondered about this a lot lately. Is a date, in fact, just semantics? Do you have to think it's a date beforehand for it to be a date? Does it have to entail a physical act (hand-holding, kissing, etc.)?

Depending on how you define a date, I might have just been on one. Or it could have just been a nice evening with a friend. I'm not sure. Whatever it was, I had a nice time.

I think I'll just pretend it was a date to take some of the pressure off the new year. Then again, I could think it wasn't a date so I don't jinx it.

This post isn't as coherent as I like my entries to be, but it's a topic I'd like to hear other opinions on. What, to you, constitutes a date? Let me know so I can figure out if I've had one.